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Violence & harassment

My family won't let me meet up with friends or go on a school trip

Jag får inte fika med kompisar eller åka på skolresa för min familj - engelska

Question

My family decides almost everything I do. There are a lot of things I'm not allowed to do. I wasn't allowed to go on the school trip, and I'm not allowed to meet up with friends. If they suspect I haven't gone straight home from school, they get really angry and threaten me.

I don't want to disappoint my family. I'm afraid of what would happen if I broke their rules. I feel lonely and think it's unfair that I'm not allowed to do things that other kids get to do. What should I do?

Answer

I understand that it feels lonely and unfair that you are not allowed to do things that other people get to do. Many young people in Sweden have similar problems. It may be because the family is worried about what other people think of them. The family may be afraid of getting a bad reputation and losing their honour. It is not okay that they threaten you, and help is available.

You write that your family will be very angry and threaten you if they suspect that you have not gone straight home from school. You also write that you are afraid of what would happen if you broke their rules.

I only know a little about your situation and not exactly what you are afraid of. It is important that you know where you can get help if you need it:

  • Contact Social Services if you are afraid that something will happen to you or if you need protection from threats or violence.
  • Call 112 if you are in danger and urgently need help.

I think you should talk to someone about this as soon as possible. For example, you could talk to a teacher, a counsellor at school, someone at a youth guidance centre, or Social Services.

You can also contact one of the places listed on this page: Stöd om du har frågor om hedersrelaterat våld och förtryck (in Swedish on UMO.se). Many of these places can be contacted anonymously, and they have experience in supporting young people in your situation.

You have the right to feel safe, spend time with friends, and enjoy your free time.

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